Monday, November 8, 2010

fuck average.

so today i visited magic club, hoping C would be there.
but this bitch i used to friends with kept coughing *bitch*
and im not paranoid, it was about me.
she has no fucking right.
so wronged me.
she just makes me so angry.
i wanted to go home and demolish kitchen.
but i didnt.
i simply had an apple and went to my room,
and read your lovely blogs. <3>
i dont need food,
i want to be lovely,
and people cant say shit to me.

sometimes i think i do this for the attention,
i dont want to,
but sometimes i feel like everyone ignores me,
because im not special because im average.
i dont want to be average.

ive had 160 calories so far.
-salad (80)
-apple ( 80)
[[total: 535]]

by doing this im probably messing myself up,
but i do so many things that do that anyway,
i mean who say drinking is wrong at 16, or smoking.
other than the government and doctors.
who the fuck cares about them.
they ruin my fun, and who says i want to live a long time anyway.
but i cant die fat and ugly.
that is not how i want to be remembered.

i think i weighed in at 143 this morning.
but i dont remember.
i should probably write these things down, maybe.

1 comment:

  1. Almost all of us do this for attention, maybe not the WHOLE reason we do this & we may not even realize it, but in some way it deals with wanting attention.

    I have a piece of paper and pencil & write down my weight every morning after weighing in so I can go back and see how much I weighed a week ago, 3 days ago, ect! Its interesting :)

    Anyways, you're not average hun. No matter what anyone says, or what any girl says about you, you're fabulous<3
    Keep your head up!